Does Anything Matter

Is anything actually worth it?

What does worth even mean? What is worthy? Am I worthy?
Does any of it even matter? Do I even matter to you?

You feel betrayed I feel dead inside.
You feel regret, I feel the person you never said but always wanted me to be frowning on me

As I take this blade across my skin I can see the end
black and white and lonely and quiet, the hell of my mind and the place you always wanted

Am I worth it?
Do I matter?
(or would I be dead?)
Do you care?

Thinking and Speaking

You tell me to think before I speak
But do you really think before you speak?
You say things that hurt
That you know hurt
And you say for everyone to hear.
Do you think before you speak?
Do you hear what you say?
Do you know how it will sting?
Everyone thinks it is perfect
That everything is fine and well.
But it's not.
This house wounds me, but you hurt the most.
No one remembers when I broke.
I felt so alone, so useless, so shattered.
And everyone forget because it got better,
as it always does.
But then it comes back and I feel the same way
But no one hears the cry behind the smile.
You tell me to think before I speak
But do you think before you speak?

Cowards

We are a family of cowards.
We steep silently, and think of our anger
But we do not speak.
We do not speak, we shout; we shout when fight which is the only time we talk.
We are a family of cowards
Who cannot say what we feel without bubbling over and shouting out.
We smile regardless of how we feel
Because
We are a family of cowards.




Cowardice is my vice